The Beginning of a Father

They say with the first child, the mother becomes a parent, and with the second, the father becomes a parent. As my husband and I are expecting our second child I have found this to be mostly true. With our first born, our daughter, we both went through the growing pains of becoming parents. However, my husband mainly followed my lead and relied on my motherly instincts. But now, at 7 months pregnant with our son, I am very limited in my hands-on ability with our daughter. 

My husband has been forced to take the lead. The beauty of this? He doesn’t do anything like me. I’ve watched him work with our three-year-old and find his own confidence as a father. I’ve watched him lean on fatherly instincts that have proven to be right, time and time again. And I have watched our daughter develop a security that can only come with the presence of a father growing in his confidence. 

But not every father is like this, in fact, my own husband grew up without the constant presence of his father. So what makes him so capable? It is the fact that he is known and loved by a perfect heavenly Father. Because at the end of the day, not all of us in this world have earthly fathers, but we do have a heavenly One, who gives our hearts and souls the security and comfort we need to be who He has called us to be. 

Psalm 68:5 calls God “A Father to the fatherless.” This not only applies to those who grow up without a father or perhaps an absent father, but also applies to when even the best fathers have passed on. Most of us, at some point, will experience life without our fathers. This same year that I watched my husband grow in his fatherhood, my mother lost her father. What a unique experience it has been to see the beginnings of a father making his mark on his daughter’s life and witnessing the legacy that mark leaves behind when he is gone. 

In her grief I have seen my mother turn to her heavenly Father for the very same things my toddler turns to her dad for when she is sad - comfort, security, encouragement, and peace. When we are young God uses our fathers, if they are willing to seek Him, to show us what it means to run to a father for these things. When we are older we learn to mainly rely on God for all those things and more. But the mark of a father never leaves us, his presence in our lives brings a steadiness and surety that allows us to embrace the uncertainty of life and when he is gone, although there is a notable absence, he lives on through the love he has given to his children and children’s children. How lucky it is to be introduced to the love of the Father through the love of a father. 

*Image created by Markus Spiske @markusspiske and used with permission via Unsplash